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babydee1Hola, Peeps,
Happy New Year! Wish all of you the very best of things in 2014.
Here's the last chapter of Snow Angel. Apologies, I'd meant for this to be my last post of 2013. No worries, though; I'll start the year as I mean to go on! :-)
Enjoy. Once again, many thanks to![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
ellashy for her wonderful banner, and to all of you for your very kind comments. *group-smish*
Title: Beauty in the Breakdown X: Snow Angel
Author:babydee1
Pairing: Chlollie
Rating: PG13
Warnings: ***Angst*** A re-telling of Chlollie post-Warrior
Timeline: Season 9
Disclaimer: All characters belong to the CW & DC comics.
Series Summary: With Oliver by her side, Chloe learns to let go, find peace, and fall in love. Tenth story in the BITB Series.
Story Summary: Very early into their marriage, Chloe and Oliver suffer a crippling loss. Very angsty
Feedback: …Always. :)
Read previous chapter here.
Read story from the beginning here.
Chapter 8
Who would you be?
What would you look like?
Would you have my smile and her eyes?
Today could have been the next day of the rest of your life
Not a day goes by that I don't think of you,
I'm always asking why this crazy world had to lose,
Such a ray of light we never knew
Gone too soon…
- Gone too soon, by Daughtry
***
Chloe rested her head on her husband’s heart and listened to the sound of his breathing. The steady, even rise and fall of his chest was usually a comfort to her, but on this occasion it was giving her cause for concern, because it was clear to her that he was wide awake.
It had been a difficult day for both of them, but Oliver’s love and infinite patience had helped her come to terms with their devastating loss. He’d done more than just comfort her tonight; he’d given her a lifeline, given her hope, just as he had done the day he’d invited her into his arms for the very first time. He had done everything to ensure that she grieved and was consoled, but she wasn’t the only person who had lost something here today; Oliver’s baby had died, too. And even as he gently stroked her hair and tried to get her to sleep, she could feel the tension in his body, evidence that he was yet to give in to his own grief.
He couldn’t sleep. And there was no way she could either, knowing he was lying beside her in unimaginable pain. Clearly he was trying to be strong for her, but if he felt even half as bad as she’d felt earlier tonight, then he was probably drowning in sorrow and grief.
Well, screw that, she thought determinedly. She wasn’t going to lie here and let her husband suffer in silence. He had saved her; it was time for her to do the same for him.
***
She wasn’t sleeping.
Oliver frowned into the darkness. He could feel no tension in her body, and her breathing was relaxed and even. He knew she had turned a corner in terms of her grief, and even though the pain would never go away, he could feel that she had made peace with herself.
So what was keeping her from sleep?
As if he’d spoken aloud, he felt her slowly turn and shift in bed, inching upwards until his head was level with her shoulder. His frown deepened; that was no easy feat, considering he was more than a foot taller that she was. He tensed and started to sit up, but she stilled him with a hand on his chest, then slowly lifted her fingers and feathered them through his hair. She slipped her other arm under his head until he was all but cradled in her arms.
Then she spoke.
“I will love you in times of sorrow and in times of joy; in times of pleasure and in times of pain; in times of plenty and in times of need,” she whispered.
Oliver inhaled sharply as she recited the vows he had spoken to her on their wedding day. He opened his mouth to speak, but she rested a finger on his lips and continued.
“In the unpredictable sea of life, I will hold fast to your hand and never release it,” she said quietly. In the darkness her fingers found his and linked tightly with them, and then it hit him with a start.
She was trying to comfort him.
Oliver swallowed. He couldn’t cry, not in front of her. He was her husband; it was his duty to be strong, to look after her and take away her pain. If he broke down now, the fragile strength and resilience he had managed to dredge up and offer her would be shattered. He couldn’t risk upsetting her all over again. He would grieve, just… not where she could see him.
But she seemed determined not to let the night pass without getting him to facing his feelings.
“We are united in love; and in the strength of that love, and in the faith of this union, I declare that any and every storm that life puts us through, we will weather together, as One.”
Oliver couldn’t hold back anymore. Grief and pain roiled up in him and barrelled its way to the surface, breaching the floodgates. A cry of agony was torn from him as he wept for the child that had been taken from them, and thought bleakly of a future that was now forever altered by yet another painful loss.
“I’m here,” Chloe whispered. Her fingertips soothed his scalp and her soft words of comfort drew even more ruptured sobs from him, his tears dampening her pyjamas. She cradled his head to her bosom and gently rocked him back and forth; warm tears from her eyes trickled through his hair, and he realised she was reliving the awful pain all over again.
“I’m sorry,” he sobbed. “I’m so sorry…”
“You’ve nothing to apologise for,” she whispered brokenly. “We’re going to get through this; together. I promise. We’re going to be okay.”
“I can’t stop thinking about her,” mumbled between sobs. “From the moment I knew about her, I loved her, so much. I had her whole life mapped out in my head, from her first day through kindergarten, high school and college...
He rambled on, his mind’s eye full of images of an amazing young woman with Chloe’s eyes and his dimpled chin. A beautiful girl; strong and healthy, with his superior physical agility and an intellect to match her mother’s. To have that life, that future taken away from them...
“She would have been so beautiful,” he whispered, his vision blurred by tears.
“I know,” Chloe replied. “I miss our baby, too.”
Oliver clung to his wife and drew strength from her slim frame. He felt the same overwhelming grief that had crippled him when his parents had died…but with a difference. This time, he wasn’t alone. He had Chloe; a light in the darkness to guide him back out into the sunshine, and he knew that he was going to be okay. They were both going to be okay.
***
Eventually, his tears subsided. Chloe turned on the lamp and used the sleeve of her pyjamas to blot away his lingering tears, and tenderly kissed his forehead.
“You okay?” she asked.
“I will be.” He rested a hand on her damp bosom and grimaced. “Ugh. Send me the dry-cleaning bill for this, will you?”
Chloe stared at him with wide eyes, and suddenly they both burst out laughing as the familiar words stirred up memories of not so long ago. Together they laughed, thinking back to that impromptu archery lesson, and the first time they were intimate…baby powder fights and declarations of love; dealing with jealous exes and concerned friends and family, all the way up until their whirlwind marriage. Had it really been less than six months since that first kiss?
Gradually the laughter died down, and Chloe smiled. “I never thought I’d hear you laugh again,” she said, stroking his jaw with her thumb. “Good to have you back, honey.”
“You brought me back,” he replied solemnly.
She smiled. “You did the same for me, I’m just returning the favour.”
His heart swelled with love for her, and he pulled her close. “Thank you, Chloe. Thank you for loving me, for knowing me the way you do.”
She tightened her arms around his waist. “Ditto.”
There was still much to be talked about, but the worst of the storm was over. In silent agreement, both of them lay down and Oliver reached out and turned off the bedside lamp.
This time, when their arms went around each other, there was no more tension.
***
The End.
Coming Soon: BITB 11: Baby Love
(…See? I told you I’d make it all better!) ;-)
***
Happy New Year! Wish all of you the very best of things in 2014.
Here's the last chapter of Snow Angel. Apologies, I'd meant for this to be my last post of 2013. No worries, though; I'll start the year as I mean to go on! :-)
Enjoy. Once again, many thanks to
ellashy for her wonderful banner, and to all of you for your very kind comments. *group-smish*Title: Beauty in the Breakdown X: Snow Angel
Author:
babydee1Pairing: Chlollie
Rating: PG13
Warnings: ***Angst*** A re-telling of Chlollie post-Warrior
Timeline: Season 9
Disclaimer: All characters belong to the CW & DC comics.
Series Summary: With Oliver by her side, Chloe learns to let go, find peace, and fall in love. Tenth story in the BITB Series.
Story Summary: Very early into their marriage, Chloe and Oliver suffer a crippling loss. Very angsty
Feedback: …Always. :)
Read previous chapter here.
Read story from the beginning here.
Chapter 8
Who would you be?
What would you look like?
Would you have my smile and her eyes?
Today could have been the next day of the rest of your life
Not a day goes by that I don't think of you,
I'm always asking why this crazy world had to lose,
Such a ray of light we never knew
Gone too soon…
- Gone too soon, by Daughtry
***
Chloe rested her head on her husband’s heart and listened to the sound of his breathing. The steady, even rise and fall of his chest was usually a comfort to her, but on this occasion it was giving her cause for concern, because it was clear to her that he was wide awake.
It had been a difficult day for both of them, but Oliver’s love and infinite patience had helped her come to terms with their devastating loss. He’d done more than just comfort her tonight; he’d given her a lifeline, given her hope, just as he had done the day he’d invited her into his arms for the very first time. He had done everything to ensure that she grieved and was consoled, but she wasn’t the only person who had lost something here today; Oliver’s baby had died, too. And even as he gently stroked her hair and tried to get her to sleep, she could feel the tension in his body, evidence that he was yet to give in to his own grief.
He couldn’t sleep. And there was no way she could either, knowing he was lying beside her in unimaginable pain. Clearly he was trying to be strong for her, but if he felt even half as bad as she’d felt earlier tonight, then he was probably drowning in sorrow and grief.
Well, screw that, she thought determinedly. She wasn’t going to lie here and let her husband suffer in silence. He had saved her; it was time for her to do the same for him.
***
She wasn’t sleeping.
Oliver frowned into the darkness. He could feel no tension in her body, and her breathing was relaxed and even. He knew she had turned a corner in terms of her grief, and even though the pain would never go away, he could feel that she had made peace with herself.
So what was keeping her from sleep?
As if he’d spoken aloud, he felt her slowly turn and shift in bed, inching upwards until his head was level with her shoulder. His frown deepened; that was no easy feat, considering he was more than a foot taller that she was. He tensed and started to sit up, but she stilled him with a hand on his chest, then slowly lifted her fingers and feathered them through his hair. She slipped her other arm under his head until he was all but cradled in her arms.
Then she spoke.
“I will love you in times of sorrow and in times of joy; in times of pleasure and in times of pain; in times of plenty and in times of need,” she whispered.
Oliver inhaled sharply as she recited the vows he had spoken to her on their wedding day. He opened his mouth to speak, but she rested a finger on his lips and continued.
“In the unpredictable sea of life, I will hold fast to your hand and never release it,” she said quietly. In the darkness her fingers found his and linked tightly with them, and then it hit him with a start.
She was trying to comfort him.
Oliver swallowed. He couldn’t cry, not in front of her. He was her husband; it was his duty to be strong, to look after her and take away her pain. If he broke down now, the fragile strength and resilience he had managed to dredge up and offer her would be shattered. He couldn’t risk upsetting her all over again. He would grieve, just… not where she could see him.
But she seemed determined not to let the night pass without getting him to facing his feelings.
“We are united in love; and in the strength of that love, and in the faith of this union, I declare that any and every storm that life puts us through, we will weather together, as One.”
Oliver couldn’t hold back anymore. Grief and pain roiled up in him and barrelled its way to the surface, breaching the floodgates. A cry of agony was torn from him as he wept for the child that had been taken from them, and thought bleakly of a future that was now forever altered by yet another painful loss.
“I’m here,” Chloe whispered. Her fingertips soothed his scalp and her soft words of comfort drew even more ruptured sobs from him, his tears dampening her pyjamas. She cradled his head to her bosom and gently rocked him back and forth; warm tears from her eyes trickled through his hair, and he realised she was reliving the awful pain all over again.
“I’m sorry,” he sobbed. “I’m so sorry…”
“You’ve nothing to apologise for,” she whispered brokenly. “We’re going to get through this; together. I promise. We’re going to be okay.”
“I can’t stop thinking about her,” mumbled between sobs. “From the moment I knew about her, I loved her, so much. I had her whole life mapped out in my head, from her first day through kindergarten, high school and college...
He rambled on, his mind’s eye full of images of an amazing young woman with Chloe’s eyes and his dimpled chin. A beautiful girl; strong and healthy, with his superior physical agility and an intellect to match her mother’s. To have that life, that future taken away from them...
“She would have been so beautiful,” he whispered, his vision blurred by tears.
“I know,” Chloe replied. “I miss our baby, too.”
Oliver clung to his wife and drew strength from her slim frame. He felt the same overwhelming grief that had crippled him when his parents had died…but with a difference. This time, he wasn’t alone. He had Chloe; a light in the darkness to guide him back out into the sunshine, and he knew that he was going to be okay. They were both going to be okay.
***
Eventually, his tears subsided. Chloe turned on the lamp and used the sleeve of her pyjamas to blot away his lingering tears, and tenderly kissed his forehead.
“You okay?” she asked.
“I will be.” He rested a hand on her damp bosom and grimaced. “Ugh. Send me the dry-cleaning bill for this, will you?”
Chloe stared at him with wide eyes, and suddenly they both burst out laughing as the familiar words stirred up memories of not so long ago. Together they laughed, thinking back to that impromptu archery lesson, and the first time they were intimate…baby powder fights and declarations of love; dealing with jealous exes and concerned friends and family, all the way up until their whirlwind marriage. Had it really been less than six months since that first kiss?
Gradually the laughter died down, and Chloe smiled. “I never thought I’d hear you laugh again,” she said, stroking his jaw with her thumb. “Good to have you back, honey.”
“You brought me back,” he replied solemnly.
She smiled. “You did the same for me, I’m just returning the favour.”
His heart swelled with love for her, and he pulled her close. “Thank you, Chloe. Thank you for loving me, for knowing me the way you do.”
She tightened her arms around his waist. “Ditto.”
There was still much to be talked about, but the worst of the storm was over. In silent agreement, both of them lay down and Oliver reached out and turned off the bedside lamp.
This time, when their arms went around each other, there was no more tension.
***
The End.
Coming Soon: BITB 11: Baby Love
(…See? I told you I’d make it all better!) ;-)
***
Tags:
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2014-01-03 07:32 pm (UTC)I wish a year of happiness for you and your family!
no subject
Date: 2014-01-03 11:08 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-01-03 08:42 pm (UTC)Seriously though, that's an awesome gift you've given us there to start the new year with! Seeing Oliver break down and Chloe comfort him was so powerful, and then there was that line:
'He would grieve, just… not where she could see him.'
Trust me this mentality is extremely widespread among men, I should know!
Good thing Ollie had his wife reminding him of his own promises and in the end it made them stronger.
Now you made us go through pain and grieve with them, you better make it up to us with the next instalment! (grr) Thank you for that and the unique way your writing conveys the characters' emotions, that's one more happy reader you've made! :)
no subject
Date: 2014-01-03 11:58 pm (UTC)Huzzah!!! :-D
"Seriously though, that's an awesome gift you've given us there to start the new year with! Seeing Oliver break down and Chloe comfort him was so powerful, and then there was that line:
'He would grieve, just… not where she could see him.'
Trust me this mentality is extremely widespread among men, I should know!"
Grr!!! Men. When are y'all gonna learn that tears =/= weakness? *shakes head*
"Good thing Ollie had his wife reminding him of his own promises and in the end it made them stronger.
Now you made us go through pain and grieve with them, you better make it up to us with the next instalment! (grr)"
I will, I will, I promise! Ha-ha! :-D
"Thank you for that and the unique way your writing conveys the characters' emotions, that's one more happy reader you've made! :)"
Yippee!!! A happy reader is my payment, and I feel like I just hit the jackpot. I imagine you look something like this right now:
"Thanks so much for all your very thoughtful comments, Mark. I really appreciate it! *hugs*
no subject
Date: 2014-01-03 10:23 pm (UTC)now Oliver knows he's not alone anymore since the loss of his parents <3
there were lots of emotion througth this chap and i really loved it...
thanks to you for sharing such a great fics... please keep on making us dreaming about our adorable blonds :)
and Best Wishes for the New Yean... and lots and lots fics to write for us... thank you ;)
XoXo
no subject
Date: 2014-01-04 12:04 am (UTC)You're welcome! And they're both very intuitive about what the other one is feeling, so they always know when sump'n ain't right and what to do to make it better.
"now Oliver knows he's not alone anymore since the loss of his parents <3
True. His wife is his family now.
"there were lots of emotion througth this chap and i really loved it...
thanks to you for sharing such a great fics... please keep on making us dreaming about our adorable blonds :)"
I will do, and I'm so thrilled you liked it!
"...and Best Wishes for the New Year... and lots and lots fics to write for us... thank you ;)"
XoXo
Ha-ha, I'll do my best! *hugs*
no subject
Date: 2014-01-04 04:23 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-01-06 11:45 pm (UTC)Glad you liked it, my love! :-D
no subject
Date: 2014-01-04 05:57 am (UTC)I can't wait for the next part of this series.
Happy writing.
Hope you had a wonderful Christmas and Happy New Year too!!!
no subject
Date: 2014-01-04 10:49 am (UTC)The next series will surely be full of love and are already very eager to read it.
Thanks for having me moved and excited again with your stories. Happy New Year Dee
no subject
Date: 2014-01-04 10:52 am (UTC)Reciting the wedding vows to console her husband was so perfect, there were so lots of emotion througth this chap and i really loved it.
Thank you so much for your wonderful writing I can't wait for the next part of this series.
Thank you again and Happy New Year!!!
no subject
Date: 2014-01-04 12:15 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2015-03-21 07:20 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-01-04 03:03 pm (UTC)I'm still working my way through Dawn's fic (I have this whole chapter-for-chapter reward system because I like to over-complicate things... also lists), but I will be popping into one of yours as soon as I've worked my way to it. It's on the list. Just let me know which fic you'd most like me to read, if you'd be so kind. :)
no subject
Date: 2014-01-04 04:15 pm (UTC)Soooooooo gratifying! And I agree, it's quite sad to see both readers and writers dwindling in the Smallville fandom, but as long as there are people reading and appreciating my stories, I'm happy to continue in the biz. :-)
"I'm still working my way through Dawn's fic (I have this whole chapter-for-chapter reward system because I like to over-complicate things... also lists), but I will be popping into one of yours as soon as I've worked my way to it. It's on the list. Just let me know which fic you'd most like me to read, if you'd be so kind. :)"
Aw, thank you, babes - I appreciate the honour! I'd recommend Orchestrato, because I know how intrigued you are by the Chlex dynamic and I'd be interested to see your views of my take on it. And I'll extend the same invitation: please let me know which of your completed stories you'd like me to read first!
Dawn's fic is simply a masterpiece, and I'm so glad you're still enjoying it!
no subject
Date: 2014-01-07 02:39 am (UTC)I was kind of thinking I'd get into Orchestrato already as I've been missing Chlex. So glad that's the one you picked.
As for mine... Obviously, I want everyone in the world to read my most precious baby, The Almost Series, but I know it's quite the undertaking. So I guess I'd say either How We Got Here (which Dawn seemed to enjoy a lot and I know you two are awfully simpatico) or Before Sunset (which is probably my most popular straight-up Chlark fic). One of them is my season 9 fixer and one of them has lots and lots of sex.
no subject
Date: 2015-03-21 07:19 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-01-05 01:25 pm (UTC)Beautiful
no subject
Date: 2014-01-05 02:52 pm (UTC)I'm glad they found comfort in each other. I can't wait to read the next chapter.
Thank you so much for this!
no subject
Date: 2014-01-06 01:25 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-01-06 05:19 pm (UTC)Their laughter through tears at the end was cathartic and hopeful. Thank you for this beautiful piece. :)
no subject
Date: 2014-01-07 08:43 am (UTC)Amazing chapter, and so good ending.... I am so glad they are good again....
no subject
Date: 2014-01-07 03:58 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-04-27 11:49 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-04-28 01:31 pm (UTC)Patience, child. :-)
no subject
Date: 2014-04-28 03:41 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2014-04-28 10:08 pm (UTC)I really do want to get back to BITB, but I appear to work better when my focus isn't divided. When I have too many WIPs on the go, I put myself under pressure to work on all of them at once, and they end up getting left undone. I have two Chlark fics that are currently suffering from that exact same problem, so I'm pacing myself with Chlollie in order to focus on the quality of the fix rather than quantity. When I do, I find that the quantity always takes care of itself.
Believe it or not, Tricksies was meant to be 4 chapters max, and is mow approaching twice that target length. The trick is not to rush me, and to comment frequently (seriously, feedback is my crack!) Fingers crossed, I'll have the next chapter of Tricksies ready for you in the next couple of days. :-)
no subject
Date: 2015-03-21 02:14 pm (UTC)It's been too long since i read this series, but it does mean more than was written last time, so more for me to read!
no subject
Date: 2015-03-21 06:27 pm (UTC)