Chlark Fanfic: Agenda, Chapter 19
Dec. 10th, 2011 09:58 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
babydee1
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sylvanelfmistre Title: Agenda
Author:
babydee1Pairing: Chlark
Rating: NC-17 (mostly PG-13)
Warnings: Chlark Fight! Come on, y'all knew this was coming...
Timeline: Futurefic; follows Season 8’s Injustice &
Disclaimer: All known characters belong to the CW & DC comics.
Summary: More than a decade after the Doomsday Rampage, Clark makes a shocking discovery that changes his life forever.
Feedback: …makes me squee. :-)
Written for the 2011
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-community.gif){kind=small}
smallvillebbang long Fanfic challenge. Many thanks to twinsarein for all her tireless organisation and support!Beta’ed by
legendarytobes & The Fallen Sky at KSite.Art by
sylvanelfmistre & go_clo.Read previous chapter here.
Read story from the beginning here.
Chapter 19
“Oh, God,” Chloe moaned, trembling violently. “Oh my God, what’s happened to her?”
“Chloe---” he took her shoulders and breathed deeply, forcing himself to remain calm. “Chloe, it’s gonna be okay, don’t panic---”
“Don’t panic?” she echoed, her voice rising. “Don’t panic?? My daughter’s gone missing, and you’re telling me not to panic???”
“She’s my daughter too,” he said, his voice hardening. “And you working yourself up into a state isn’t going to help us find her.”
“Well excuse me for being just a little bit concerned that my child has gone missing!” she screamed as she brushed his hands off. “This is exactly why I didn’t want to bring her to you, Clark!”
Pain lanced his heart like a kryptonite sword. “Don’t say that,” he said threateningly. “Don’t you dare say that---”
“Thirteen years I had her. Thirteen years and we were fine, we were fine!!!” she raged, oblivious to his pain. “I bring her to you, and three months later she disappears. Fat lot of good having a father has been to her!” She shook her head and gave a harsh laugh. “We should have stayed in Gotham.”
His blood boiled with rage and pain. “Are you blaming me for this? This isn’t my fault, Chloe, I’m as terrified as you are!”
“Really?” she breathed. “Well, you have a very calm way of showing it.”
He pointed a shaky finger in her face. “Screaming and losing control is what almost lost you your daughter in the first place,” he said, satisfied when he saw her wince. “If you hadn’t brought her to me, she’d have found her way here anyway. Apparently, there are some things fathers are good for – like mending the strained relationships between mothers and their teenage daughters.”
“So now I’m a bad mother?” she accused.
“You should have told me about her from the start, Chloe,” he grated. “Every child needs a father, and rob both Gabby and me of that for almost fourteen years---”
“Oh, don’t start that again,” she muttered, waving her hands dismissively.
His blood ran cold. “Excuse me?” he said hoarsely.
“I’ve explained to you ad nauseam why I couldn’t let you know you had a child,” she said stonily. “No way on this earth I was going to make Superman’s enemies aware that he has a daughter.”
“I understand you wanted to keep Gabby out of harm’s way once she was born, or even after I returned to Metropolis three years ago,” he said. “What I don’t get is why you didn’t come to the Fortress and tell me the second you found out you were pregnant. Don’t you think I had the right to know that?”
“Of course you did!”
“So why not tell me, Chloe?” he roared. “How could you be so selfish?”
“Selfish?” she whispered. “Are you kidding me?”
“What else do you call it?” he challenged. “I’ve been deprived of the first thirteen years of my own daughter’s life because you’d rather she grew up in a Billionaire’s mansion---”
“You leave Bruce out of this,” she warned in a threatening tone. “He’s been nothing but supportive of me and Gabby---”
“I would have been that support, Chloe! I’m her father!”
“I couldn’t tell you!”
“Why the hell not?”
“You know why!” she cried. “To protect her, to protect both of you – I thought you understood that!”
“Yeah, well I lied,” he said bluntly. “That’s not a good enough reason to deny me of my child her whole life.”
She pursed her lips and folded her hands. “I did what I had to.”
“You did it because you’re selfish,” he grated. “You’re the most selfish and controlling woman that ever lived, the fact that you kept my child from me, just makes me---” he clenched his fists and bit his tongue, but she was clearly in no mood to just sit and take whatever he was dishing out.
“Makes you what?” she challenged, folding her arms. “Hate me? Well, if I’m selfish and controlling, it’s because you were too weak and indecisive to make the right decisions when those decisions went against your moral code!”
He paled. “What did you say?”
“You heard me,” she said tersely. “Oliver and the rest of us had to clean up your messes because you didn’t want to get your pretty little hands dirty. And yet you had the gall to get up on your high horse and lecture us about how we went about things the wrong way? You jerk!”
She saw a muscle in his face tighten as he clenched his jaw hard. His eyes narrowed at her, but he said nothing in the way of a rebuttal.
“You know, deep down, that if we hadn’t done some of the things we’d had to, humanity would be toast my now,” she raged on. “So if you want to hate me for being the strong one, then go ahead. I really don’t care how you feel.”
***
She was saying too much. She knew she ought to just shut the hell up, but his cruel accusations had wounded her deeply and she couldn’t seem to stop the harsh words tumbling out of her mouth.
“You can blame me and hate me all you want Clark,” she went on, “But you’re the one who walked away from me. You’re the one who said human attachments made you weak and was your enemy. The last thing you said to me before you turned your back on me was that you were dead. I honestly didn’t think you’d want to have anything to do with me after that, baby or no baby.”
Clark glared at her for several seconds, his gaze so hard she half-expected to be toasted to a cinderblock by his heat vision.
“Just tell me this, Chloe,” he finally said coldly. “What would you have done if Gabby’s abilities had never manifested, huh? Hide her away from me for the rest of our lives? Did you ever stop to think what would become of her if something had happened to you?”
She took a deep, calming breath. This one, at least, was one she could answer without fear of reproach.
“Bruce is her legal guardian,” she said softly. “From the moment Gabby was born, I gave him specific instructions to contact you immediately in the event of my death or disappearance, and to inform you that you were Gabriella’s father.”
He narrowed his eyes as he processed this new information. “Bruce would have contacted me?”
She nodded. “By any means necessary.”
“That’s how he knew about me,” he surmised. “How he knew about kryptonite.”
She nodded. “He needed to know everything,” she confessed. “I also replicated a key to the portal for him so he can get to the Fortress in a heartbeat if Gabby ever needed you.”
Clark turned around and clutched the edges of the dresser for support. If there was one thing he’d held onto, it was the knowledge that Chloe would never ever reveal his secret to anyone. Years ago in the Yukon when he’d told her his secret she’d held his hands, stared into his eyes and vowed that his secret would never leave her lips. Ever.
And yet she’d turned around and done just that. He understood why she’d had to tell Bruce the whole truth about him, but still…
She must have read his mind. “Telling him about you was the one time I ever betrayed you, Clark,” she said softly.
“What, you don’t keeping Gabby from me is far worse?” he questioned. “My God, Chloe, you stole my child from me!”
She scowled. “I’m her mother. I can’t steal my own child.”
“No?” he challenged. “What if the situation was reversed and you discovered I’d taken Gabriella from you? Would you say a parent couldn’t steal their own child then?”
Her eyes widened and she looked positively stricken.
Clark nodded. “Yeah? Well, that’s how I feel about you right now,” he said tightly, making her flinch. “When I think about all those years I lost with Gabriella, it hurts, Chloe. It fucking hurts. Keeping her from me is betrayal of the worst kind. You know it is.”
She lowered her stricken gaze and clasped her hands tightly together. “I know.”
“Then why did you do it?”
She swallowed. “To protect you both---”
“Bullshit,” he said, turning around and striding towards her. When he got to where she was standing, he grasped her shoulders. “Because if you really worried about exposing Gabby to superhero enemies, you’d never had gotten involved with Bruce. Would you?”
A look of stark fear crossed her eyes, and he realised with dread that his earlier suspicions were correct. There was still something else she was hiding from him; a deeper, more profound reason for not telling him about his daugher. And he was determined to find out what it was.
“Damn it, Chloe, why?” he roared, shaking her as hard as he dared. “Tell me!”
“Because you’d finally embraced your destiny!” she cried. “Clark, I wanted to tell you. So many times I went to the caves and was tempted to go to you, show you what I looked like with your child growing me. But if I’d done that…it would have changed everything.”
“For the better,” he whispered. “Chloe, if I’d known you were pregnant I’d have been by your side from Day One. I’d have turned my back on the Fortress and Jor-El and everything else in a heartbeat.”
“Exactly,” she said quietly. “And Superman wouldn’t exist.”
His heart seemed to stop as her words sank in.
“You don’t know that for sure,” he whispered. “I could have done it all, been both father and hero…”
“Could you?” she challenged. “Clark, if I’d shown up at the Fortress with my belly out to here, can you honestly tell me you would have cared about becoming the hero the world needs?”
He swallowed. “Yes,” he finally replied. But he was lying to himself and to her, and she knew it because she shook her head sadly.
“No, Clark. You just said it yourself - you’d have turned your back on everything that defines you.”
Clark took a deep breath and stared at her, pain reflected in his eyes.
“So that was your agenda all along?” he whispered softly. “Take credit for giving the world Superman? Deny me of my right to be a father so I can fulfil my destiny and fly around saving everybody in the world but the two people who need me the most?”
She gulped. “It was the hardest decision I’ve ever had to make,” she said, tears brimming in her eyes. “And it had nothing to do with taking credit for anything, Clark. I wanted you with me, with us. God knows that from the moment I first laid eyes on you, I’ve wanted to be with you. But as we grew up I knew that you had a destiny that went way beyond the cornfields of Smallville and the State of Kansas, and that was long before I discovered your secret.”
He shrugged. “So you’d have interrupted my training, so what?” he said. “I’d have gone back to complete it later.”
“Clark, I’ve interrupted your training before,” she said, laying a tentative hand on his arm. “Seventeen years ago, remember? When you pleaded with Jor-El to stop your training so you could get me to safety. And when you didn’t go back, he stripped you of your powers and you ended up dying.”
Her words dredged up painful memories of him falling to the floor with a hole in his heart as his life blood ebbed out of him; the world blackening around him as her painful screams got fainter and fainter in his ears…
“You have no idea how much that scared me,” she continued, tears streaming down her face. “It ripped me apart, Clark. Watching you get shot through the heart, knowing you’d still have had your powers if you hadn’t stopped to save me---”
“But Jor-El brought me back,” he insisted.
“Yes, but at a cost that was too great for you to bear. He took your father’s life in your place, Clark. And then it was one problem after another and you never went back for your training until circumstances forced you there almost five years later.” She smiled wryly. “That’s one hell of a study break.”
He realised he was still holding her shoulders and quickly loosened his grasp, eventually dropping his hands entirely.
“So when I found out I was pregnant, I wanted to tell you, but…I just couldn’t. Not when I knew that this time, if I interrupted you and told you I was pregnant, you’d turn your back on your destiny and your heritage because of me and the baby. And then I’d have failed you not once, but twice.”
Her words were like a dull knife cutting into his heart, painfully highlighting years of failures and missteps.
“Then of course, there was always the risk that Jor-El would put the deep freeze on me again, and whilst he may not have killed me, I couldn’t risk harming my baby,” she said. “Which brings us back to the present. Where is she?”
“I…I don’t know,” he said brokenly.
“Oh, God, could she have somehow stumbled on some Kryptonite?” she asked in alarm. “What if she’s lying somewhere in pain?”
He shook his head quickly. “Gabby’s not allergic to Kryptonite, not like I am,” he explained. “We discovered that whilst you were away. It weakens her, yes, but thanks to her human side it only strips her of her powers. It doesn’t cause her any pain whatsoever.”
She gave a short sigh of relief, and then promptly started worrying agin. “Well…you’re her father, and you’re Kryptonian; can’t you track her, or something?”
He scowled darkly. “We’re not bloodhounds, Chloe.”
“All I meant is that you might have some other way of finding out where she is,” she explained. “Some…beacon, or parental homing device…”
Her words triggered a memory in his brain, of him tracking Chloe down by listening for her heartbeat. If it had worked on Gabby’s mother…
She babbled on. “…I mean, you all seem to come with built-in tracking systems---”
“Shh!” he said, holding up a hand to silence her. Carefully he listened, filtering out every unnecessary interfering sound one by one until finally…
“I’ve got her,” he said, his relief evident. “She’s definitely alive.”
“Oh, thank God,” Chloe cried. “Do you know if she’s okay?”
“Her heartbeat’s resting, there’s no agitation,” he said.
“Well, where is she?” Chloe persisted.
Clark trembled. “She, uh…” he swallowed. “I think she’s in the Fortress.”
***
Chapter 20…
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no subject
Date: 2011-12-10 10:52 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-01-27 12:11 am (UTC)So glad you like it, babes! :-)
no subject
Date: 2011-12-10 11:40 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-01-27 12:12 am (UTC)Thanks for your awesome comments! :-D
no subject
Date: 2011-12-10 09:32 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-01-27 12:13 am (UTC)Glad you like, Mel! :-D
no subject
Date: 2011-12-11 06:11 am (UTC)God the whole time I was reading this I wishing that Chlark would shut up... This argument was brutal and it's not even finished.
no subject
Date: 2011-12-11 07:14 pm (UTC)Heh-heh! ;-)
"God the whole time I was reading this I wishing that Chlark would shut up... This argument was brutal and it's not even finished."
Oh, you read my mind. All the while I was writing it I was thinking "Shut up! Shut up!! Shut up!!!" But at the same time, I just wanted to get all those hidden resentments out and on the surface. They can deal with them later, but they needed to be said. :-)
Glad you liked it, and I'm loving all your comments!!! :-D
no subject
Date: 2011-12-11 08:15 am (UTC)This earthquake has been building up pressure way too long; it had to shake the house soon before it destroyed everything in its path...
Now they REALLY need to talk about all this self-blame and guilt about everything they do...
I LOVED, LOVED, LOVED the way he found Gabby! That was awesome! I giggled when he got all insulted insisting his race wasn't bloodhounds, and when Chloe made the remark about built-in tracking systems.
These two sure know how to hit the bulls-eye when they let fly with the insults! Great fight!!! Hope they make up!
no subject
Date: 2011-12-11 08:18 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2011-12-12 12:55 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-01-27 12:10 am (UTC)Glad you like, Jen!
no subject
Date: 2013-02-21 03:07 am (UTC)Ouch. It is always painful to see them in a heated argument. Clark's being a jerk.
"humanity would be toast my now" Do you mean "by" now?
Ah. So that's why. Reminds me of a line I really liked from "Legion": "I just hope that if it turned out that there was no other choice, you would choose to do the right thing... To do what's best for the world... and not for me. Know that I'd understand."
no subject
Date: 2014-06-21 12:47 pm (UTC)With all that had gone on in the past, it was only a matter of time. :-)
"Ouch. It is always painful to see them in a heated argument. Clark's being a jerk."
They both said some horrible things, but they needed to be said. They'll be okay...eventually.
"humanity would be toast my now" Do you mean "by" now?
Fixed!
"Ah. So that's why. Reminds me of a line I really liked from "Legion": "I just hope that if it turned out that there was no other choice, you would choose to do the right thing... To do what's best for the world... and not for me. Know that I'd understand."
EXACTLY. It's what Chloe does... make tough sacrifices.
Many thanks for commenting, and apologies for the delay in the reply!
no subject
Date: 2014-06-24 01:55 pm (UTC)This was a gorgeous passage. She admits full out to him that she's loved him from Day One, and has never stopped. And also that she'll give him up because of that love. THAT, people, is why Chloe Sullivan is awesome and Lana "It's all about MEEEEE" Lang is a selfish shithead who made us want to fork our eyeballs out. I'm just sayin'.
“Clark, I’ve interrupted your training before,” she said, laying a tentative hand on his arm. “Seventeen years ago, remember? When you pleaded with Jor-El to stop your training so you could get me to safety. And when you didn’t go back, he stripped you of your powers and you ended up dying.”
Ah! Very true! I never considered the danger Jor-El might have been if he'd found out that Chloe was AGAIN keeping Clark from his training. He doesn't have the best track record, does he?
“You have no idea how much that scared me,” she continued, tears streaming down her face. “It ripped me apart, Clark. Watching you get shot through the heart, knowing you’d still have had your powers if you hadn’t stopped to save me---”
“But Jor-El brought me back,” he insisted.
“Yes, but at a cost that was too great for you to bear. He took your father’s life in your place, Clark."
And if that had happened a second time, if Jor-El would have taken ANOTHER person they loved as punishment (and right on the heels of Lois "dying", Jimmy dying, etc.), it wouldn't bear thinking about! Yikes! Poor Chloe!
“So when I found out I was pregnant, I wanted to tell you, but…I just couldn’t. Not when I knew that this time, if I interrupted you and told you I was pregnant, you’d turn your back on your destiny and your heritage because of me and the baby. And then I’d have failed you not once, but twice.”
*sniffs* Poor Chloe! And you know what I love here? She was willing to risk Clark's rage at her, even the possibility that she'd hate him for her decision, in order to keep him safe. Kind of like what he'd been doing for her over the last few years!
"Her words were like a dull knife cutting into his heart, painfully highlighting years of failures and missteps.
“Then of course, there was always the risk that Jor-El would put the deep freeze on me again"
Oh wow, that's true! So there was also some protective maternal instinct going on! Because while Clark might have been able to protect them both from everyone else on the planet, he's always been fairly powerless against Jor-El!
Excellent chapter, Dee, that made me feel a bit better about why these two had to be kept apart!